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“Are you stupid?”
The words are hard, even to look at. I could never imagine saying these to a member of my team.
Yet when I set out to write this article and asked everyone at my company to talk about workplace trauma, these were among their experiences: CEOs calling people stupid in a meeting; managers who get angry over small mistakes or lie about a promotion; feeling stressed and getting yelled at every single day. Fifteen percent of my employees were willing to share their stories. Some were hard to believe.
Most surprising was the prevalence of workplace trauma. Not a big “T” trauma that comes from dangerous or criminal behavior, but rather a “small T” trauma that still causes great harm, but comes from poor leadership. Toxic work environments cause people to feel unworthy, incompetent and unhappy, diminishing their potential contribution to the company. While navigating trauma from job to job requires individual responsibility, leaders and managers can and should want to help them heal.
Related: How Managers Can Dismantle Workplace Trauma
Horror stories
Trust is easy to lose and harder to gain, but a history with toxic leaders can make it even worse. In every traumatic workplace, my employees reported hearing the same messages: “We are transparent,” “a family,” and “We trust you to do your job.” Then the inconsistencies began. One described a former manager, who spread negative gossip and was hypercritical of even the smallest mistakes, leaving her suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder. One called his particularly condescending former manager a “nonviolent psychopath.”
Even after leaving a toxic company, employees risk carrying that trauma into their next workplace. They may read articles about spotting a healthy culture, even joining a new team, full of hope, but any sign of toxic behavior and they quickly lose that optimism. Many stay, feeling trapped without options or economic stability, but the longer they spend in these toxic work environments, the more they instill fear and insecurity. Without healing, people carry that trauma with them, reducing the potential value they might bring or want to contribute to any future company.
The impact of leaders
Leadership behavior sets the tone for the entire organization. In my 30-year career, I have never yelled because yelling would have been incongruent with my expressed beliefs that mistakes are opportunities for growth and continuous improvement. When words and actions are inconsistent, an employee who has experienced trauma will more quickly lose all trust in the company’s leadership.
While the vision and actions of senior leadership lay the foundation for a supportive workplace culture, day-to-day experiences with direct management and colleagues have the greatest impact. As CEO, I can give managers the tools they need to build trusting relationships and empower them to support healing, so we hired someone to wrap the insights and skills of our highest performing managers into a training program. By training them in effective communication, recognizing trauma, and promoting an emotionally safe environment, leaders can help managers mitigate the effects of past trauma on the rest of the workplace.
Related: Why Integrating Trauma Will Give You a Competitive Advantage in Leadership
Rebuild consistently
To rebuild trust after a traumatic experience, consistency is key. Leaders and managers must do more than talk about emotional intelligence and living company values: they must visibly and consistently demonstrate actions that live up to those words over time. One team member noted how surprised he was that the CEO had emailed him to recognize his efforts just a few days after joining the team, but even more so that any continued experience with leadership from then she aligned herself with that behavior.
Start working to rebuild trust from day one. One person commented on the authenticity and transparency he felt in his first conversation with the CEO and how, after almost four years with us, this has continued. Most of my employees remembered smaller daily events that made the biggest difference: supportive emails, free movie tickets, and flexibility to handle last-minute emergencies. They also mentioned team bonding opportunities on non-work topics, like our trip to Las Vegas and book club, as helpful in alleviating trauma by calming worries that coworkers might cause similar problems.
Plan, evaluate and improve
There is no magic way to heal people from pre-existing trauma, but regular check-ins are the best way to help. It may be uncomfortable to talk about toxic experiences, but individually managers can spot, identify and help resolve individual challenges in the workplace more easily. Create a standardized process to ensure consistent experiences and leverage technology platforms to facilitate planning and clear communication.
HR can be invaluable in supporting these check-ins: gathering employee feedback, assisting managers, or participating themselves. When we hired an HR manager, she took over the regular one-on-one meetings, and her open-ended questions were incredibly successful in bringing past workplace traumas to light. Her ability to make people feel at ease garnered valuable feedback, which built stronger relationships and did the company a lot of good.
When check-ins are successful, recognize and reward the efforts behind that success. One employee described the profound impact of a simple “thank you” on his confidence in leadership and organizational commitment. By exemplifying and sharing successful check-in stories, leaders encourage an environment of supportive interactions between managers and employees.
Related: Occupational Trauma Is a Real Thing. Here’s how to recognize it and recover.
Our positive results
At a social event in February, we invited everyone to send Valentines to their colleagues expressing how special it was to work together. The next day we received the messages others had sent us and a second wave of positive feelings. Then, people took to social media and elaborated on the impact: “It’s great to wake up and read all the love from our Influence Mobile family. Thank you for encouraging such a pleasant and positive work environment.” That single spark of positivity became contagious.
No one can heal someone else’s trauma, but leaders can do a lot to facilitate their healing journey. By fostering a culture of consistency and support among employees, managers and colleagues, we can build a work environment where people overcome past workplace traumas.